簡單經典的英文笑話帶翻譯？

　　笑話一般指短小、滑稽的故事，通過簡單的英語笑話我們在娛樂的同時也可以無負擔地學習到英語。本文是，希望對大家有幫助!
　?。篍xpand and contract 熱脹冷縮
　　Teacher: We all know that heat causes an object to expand and cold causes it tocontract. Now, can anyone give me a good example?

　　John: Well, in the summer the days are long, and in the winter the days are short.

　　老師：我們都知道熱脹冷縮的道理。現(xiàn)在，誰給我舉個例子?

　　約翰：嗯，在夏天天都長，在冬天天都短。
　?。篒 guess you're right 我想你是對的
　　Son: Dad, give me a dime.

　　Father: Son, don't you think you're getting too big to be forever begging for dimes?

　　Son: I guess you're right, Dad, Give me a dollar, will you?

　　兒子：爸爸，給我一角錢。

　　父親：兒子，你不認為你已經長大了，不該再老是一角一角地要錢了，不是嗎?

　　兒子：爸爸，我想你是對的，那給我一塊錢行嗎?
　?。篈 great man 一名偉人
　　Teacher: Would Shakespeare be a great man if he were still alive today?

　　Student: Of course. He must be a great man, for so far nobody has lived to over 400 years.

　　老師：如果莎士比亞還活著，他會是一名偉人嗎?

　　學生：當然。因為到目前為止，還沒有人活到400多歲。
　?。篖ady First 女士優(yōu)先
　　A teacher asked her class: "Is the sentence 'The ox and the cow are in the fields' correct?" Most of the children said: "Yes, it is all right!" And only one little boy said: "No, it is not correct. The lady must be mentioned first."

　　一位老師問班上的學生：“‘公牛和母牛在田里’這個句子對嗎?” 大多數(shù)學生回答說：“對，一點不錯?！?只有一個小男孩說：“不對，應該先說女士。”
　?。篊ount Tomorrow Morning
　　It's a right. John is looking at the sky.

　　Tom is John's younger brother. He asks John "What are you doing?"

　　John says, "I'm counting stars.”

　　Tom laughs and says, "It's really dark now. Why not count them tomorrow morning?"

　　這是一個晚上。約翰抬頭看著天空。

　　湯姆是約翰的弟弟。他問約翰：“你在干什么?”

　　約翰說：“我在數(shù)星星。”

　　湯姆笑著說：“現(xiàn)在天空太黑了。你為什么不等到明天早上再數(shù)呢?”